oh man. if you have a friend who can make you giggle like a thirteen year old in the midst of being fucking sat on by the sumo wrestler of depression ... lemme tell you, that is pure gold.
buttercup: I don't know
buttercup: I'm just no fun when I'm depressed. Y'know, unlike all the other depressed people
buttercup: who are hired to be the dancers at bar mitzvahs
bubbles: and phone sex opeators
buttercup: that, I could probably still do fairly competently
bubbles: yeah
bubbles: you could have a "dark" special
buttercup: the potty mouth is like the energizer bunny
buttercup: it just goes on ... and on ... and on ....
bubbles: for the masochists
buttercup: I could cry for the sadists
bubbles: almost spit my juice tea
buttercup: talk about my paiiiinnnnnnnn
buttercup: owwwwww
bubbles: offer to sell beakers of your tears
buttercup: tears rolling down my boobs
bubbles: yes, and then zip-lock your bra
bubbles: $10 a pop
bubbles: wait--that'd be a net loss
buttercup: tears are loaded with hormones
bubbles: just tuck some tissues in there
buttercup: I'd have to wear the 'shot' bras
buttercup: the ones I'm about to replace anyway
bubbles: i remember some story of a man who thought he'd be "cured" by the tears of small chilren
bubbles: so his "butler" would collect children and bring themto the mansion, tell them horrible stories about their families
bubbles: and then collect the tears
buttercup: someone I know drinks her own pee when she is getting sick
bubbles: almost spit again
bubbles: must look up before I do that
buttercup: apparently it's homeopathy
bubbles: yes, I have actually seen it
buttercup: no kind of homeopathy I cotton to
bubbles: no wait--that was on that Tom Hanks movie
buttercup: they knew a doctor in Germany who would inject your pee into you
bubbles: i have actually heard of him
buttercup: also, he did fantasy scenes
buttercup: kidding
bubbles: but haven't corresponded
bubbles: and not planning to
bubbles: fending off your next question
buttercup: I did tell you about that 'gynecologist', didn't I?
bubbles: the one who put his own sperm into people?
bubbles: oh no I told that one in response
buttercup: no, the one who advertised free exams in the paper
bubbles: yes
buttercup: and worked out of a storage facility
bubbles: in his garage
buttercup: and offered fantasy scenes in his ad
buttercup: no, it was an office space in a u-store facility
bubbles: yes and did well enough to move to a 10x10 in just three short weeks
buttercup: heee
bubbles: more tables that way
bubbles: line-em up
bubbles: no waiting
buttercup: oh god that was like my first smile all day
bubbles: haaaaaaa
bubbles: I STILL HAVE IT
buttercup: you really are good
buttercup: why don't you do this for a living?
buttercup: wait wait wait I know
buttercup: because it would SUCK
bubbles: give me pee, OBGYN, sex talk, depression, and the energizer bunny, and I can move the world
buttercup: what doesn't kill me ... makes me ... fucking depressed
buttercup: no, wait, makes me funnier. yeah. right
bubbles: what doesn't kill me is a rat bastard
bubbles: do a girl a favor, eh?
buttercup: ratbastard motherfucker to you, lady
bubbles: what doesn't kill me doesn't find me worth the trouble
buttercup: what doesn't kill me wasn't half trying
bubbles: what doesn't kill me is a fucking pussy
buttercup: what doesn't kill me, flays me and leaves me for dogmeat
bubbles: what doesn't kill me is going to have to take lessons from me
buttercup: dibs
buttercup: hahahahha
buttercup: first time I grabbed dibs on an IM
bubbles: what doesn't kill me leaves me pale and in need of a transfusion
bubbles: SHIT
buttercup: what doesn't kill me wasn't my type
bubbles: damn me and my touch-typing
bubbles: haaaaaaa
bubbles: what doesn't kill me, I can still date
buttercup: what doesn't kill me is not the marrying kind
bubbles: what doesn't kill me, could be Mr. Right
bubbles: opposite jinx
bubbles: what doesn't kill me can still bring me home to mother
buttercup: what doesn't kill me doesn't do windows?
bubbles: what DOES kill me can still do that, in a Hefty
buttercup: HAAAAA
buttercup: what doesn't kill me doesn't thrill me
bubbles: what doesn't kill me isn't really bloggable
bubbles: i'm out
buttercup: I think we shot our bolt there
buttercup: it went pretty far though
bubbles: now I'M depressed
bubbles: kidding
bubbles: but I am
bubbles: but I'll live
buttercup: well, but more than usual?
bubbles: because it doesn't kill me
buttercup: no, it just makes killing sound interesting
bubbles: almost spit again--that time it was crushed ice
buttercup: well at least it doesn't stain
bubbles: *ping off the monitor
Hi. We're still with you, standing next to you and supporting you through this thing.
Hold on to all you can, you will get through this.
Posted by: scott | Monday, 24 January 2005 at 05:43 AM
What doesn't kill me can make the bed when it's finished with me.
Posted by: zeno | Monday, 24 January 2005 at 05:56 AM